Friday was an emotionally tough day. I got to leave the hospital and I can say that I was excited about that but I was not ready to leave Holt. You know as a new parent it's hard to leave your new baby after 4 days. Let's just say I cried a lot! We left the hospital around noon and went to Target to get my pain medication and some blankets and mittens for Holt to have while in the NICU. Then we went to the house where I will be staying for the rest of the time that I am here. We are so blessed to have such wonderful family friends that have opened their home to us while we are here in Dallas. After getting settled in we of course went straight back up to the hospital. Holt is doing great! I got to change his diaper and take his temperature. I'm sure the nurse thought I was crazy because I got so excited about changing a diaper. Of course when you go from no contact with your baby to changing a diaper you will take any chance you can get. All day Friday they were slowly taking Holt off the pain medication to allow him to wake up so they could take him off the breathing machine. It took a little longer then they expected because he was just as happy as could be sleeping. (something he gets from me of course, I love sleep! ) Thursday they closed his PDA and he did great! They watched him closely on Friday and they were very please with how he was responding and the function of his heart.
Saturday we came into a great surprise. Holt was breathing on his own! He has a nasal cannula to help him breath until he gets the hang of breathing. Saturday Holt learned how to suck on a pacifier. He loves the pacifier. We are teaching him how to suck on the paci while he his being feed. We are feeding right now through the feeding tub in his nose. Once his breathing slows down to normal then we will start bottle feeding until I can hold him then the next step will be breast feeding. He also opened his eyes on Saturday for a few seconds. He has such wonderful blue eyes!
Sunday I got to place my arms under Holt's head and legs. It was the closest I have been to holding him and I was in heaven! I haven't been able to hold him because of all the lines he has in him but the sweet nurse took pity on me and let me semi-hold him! Oh what a wonderful day it will be when I can finally hold that sweet baby in my arms! But for now I am just over joyed when he holds my finger.
Today has been a wonderful day! My sister in law came in town to help drive me around and help while I still recover from my c-section. This morning when we walked in Holt's room he was wrapped in a blanket and sucking on his pacifier. It was the sweetest cuties thing I'd ever seen!! And of course the first thing we did was grab the camera and take a million pictures. Holt today was very awake and alert. It was so fun to watch him lay there looking around the room.
I mean how could you not stare at that face all the time? It is so fun to watch him discover the world around him. While we were there this morning the cardiologist came in and we had such a great report! He said they could not be more pleased with how good Holt is doing. He went on to say that they feel like it's highly likely that the cath. procedure will be enough for a while to get Holt older before he will need other intervention. He said more intervention is inevitable but when we will just have to watch. It could be a 4 months or it could be 5 or 10 years old. Of course that will only come with time. He also said that his left vent. is pumping better. We were told a percentage today and I cannot tell you exactly what it is for but I'm going to share it because it's wonderful. I think it has to do with pumping. When we were first seen the left vent function was at 3% today it's at 18%! A normal heart his size is between 22-46%.... if that's not a miracle I'm not sure what is! I can't help but see the Lord every time I look at Holt's sweet face. He is our little miracle. We still have a couple more weeks here in the hospital but everyday that we are there gets better then the day before.
I know that the news we heard today is only because of the grace of God and the mercy he has shown on our sweet boy. So thank you for standing with me and Josh in prayer for our little guy. I can't wait for the day when he is old enough for me to share with him what God has done for him and the miracle he already has been. Don't worry I already tell him that every time I see him but someday he will understand. As for what is next, we are just watching. Everyday they take away a different medication and Holt is doing great.
As for now please continue to pray for Holt's heart to continue getting better and better. Also for Josh and myself. It was very hard for him to leave and go back to work today. He has been so wonderful! My emotions are all over the place and he has been so understanding and my rock during this time. At any given moment I can burst into tears and he just sweetly takes my hand and lets me know that it's all ok. He even stayed in Dallas last night and got up early today to drive back to Tyler. I am blessed beyond belief to have him as my husband. I could not have asked for a better one! He will be back on Thursday night but it is not easy having him be so far away. I know we are going to be stronger from this experience and someday we will be able to live as a family under one roof someday but it's just not easy while you're in the middle of it.
Thank you for your prayers and encouragement. They are so needed!
I am so very happy Lauren. Your faith blesses me tremendously. Holt is absolutely precious and I can't wait to see you and Josh and Holt on Friday. I love you.
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